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Dealing with Guilt

9/3/2013

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Guilt is one of the more destructive emotions which we can get caught up in, leaving us with nagging thoughts of self-doubt and feelings of worthlessness.  We typically experience guilt if we have gone against our own truth, or have wronged another. 

Guilt can feel like a rock on our chest, and feelings of guilt often include replaying a situation over and over in our heads, which can lead to obsessive thinking, anxiety, and self punishment.

While we all long to be better, more loving and authentic people, getting caught in a cycle of guilt can lead to despair and loss of clarity. 

If you find yourself feeling guilty, here are some suggestions for dealing with guilt:

·         Take a moment to write out the guilty thoughts and feelings you’re experiencing in the present moment.  Write out the self talk exactly as it happens without censoring what you write. 

·         Once you have emptied those thoughts and feelings onto the page, read over what you wrote to get a sense of how you make yourself feel guilty.  Do you recognize the voice on the page as your own, or perhaps it belongs to a parent, or another authority figure?  We often unconsciously internalize values that belong to our parents, or the collective social or religious systems.

·         If you feel that you have wronged another, consider apologizing to them.  Speak from the heart.  If speaking is difficult, consider writing a letter. 

·         If you have wronged yourself, perhaps you need to forgive yourself for placing unrealistic expectations on your situation.  We all go astray from time to time.  Learn from it, let go of the negative feelings, and use the lesson not to make the same mistake again.

If you try the above approach and still find yourself stuck in the guilt cycle, you may want to consider clinical counselling, which has been proven to help people through guilt and other limiting experiences.


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